So, corporations want to be treated like people and be allowed to buy political favors in the form of campaign contributions.

I say, let's make corporations even more like people:

• A corporation, through its action or inaction, causes a large catastrophe or many deaths, should be (after a proper trial) subject to execution. Once found guilty, the corporation is to be dissolved with all its assets transferred to trust funds to those adversely affected and to non-executive employees.
  
• A corporation, through its action or inaction, causes some lesser catastrophe, should be (after a proper trial) subject to imprisonment of its executive officers. The officers like to get large salaries, bonuses and golden parachutes -- take the rewards without the risks. Now, they get the risks, as well.
• Just as people are not permitted to buy other people, corporations are not permitted to buy other corporations. If you want your corporation to grow, make a better product or price it better than the other guy. Buying out your competition is inconsistent with market forces.

Any other attributes that corporations should be endowed with?

Today's events:

• First lawn cutting of the season
• Update financial software and hookup to new accounts at PNC
• Floss teeth and pop a gold crown
• Visit Target to get free reusable shopping bags